Author Archives: The Honeybee

Forgive Yourself

Hello Honeybees,

We are all a work in progress. No one has it all together no matter what their Instagram feed or Facebook page says. I know that I am definitely a serious work in progress. I’m working on me! One of the major things that I am working on is forgiving myself.

The weird thing is that I will forgive, not necessarily forget, a person that has done me wrong. But when it comes to me forgiving me that’s where I have a block. I hold myself to a much higher standard than I do other people because I can only control me & my actions.

I’ve made some huge mistakes in my past that I am still trying to forgive myself for. I have asked God for forgiveness & I believe that He has forgiven me, so why am I still holding on? The holding on is keeping me from moving forward. I need to leave all of that baggage in the past where it belongs. Y’all that stuff is heavy, too heavy for me to keep carrying. It takes up to much mental & emotional space. I need that space to enjoy my NOW.

So as you are reading this know that I am one gigantic step closer to forgiving myself, to letting the past go and moving forward. From this day forward I will no longer entertain what I use to do. I will only entertain what I do now and in the future. I’m leaving the past where it belongs….in the past. I forgive ME!

What past mistake are you holding on to? What’s stopping you from letting them go?

Beewisdom-“Never forget that to forgive yourself is to release trapped energy that could be doing good work in the world.” -D. Patrick Miller

 

Photos: Desiree @mocha_divas  

Position Yourself

Hello Honeybees,

Recently I was listening to Soledad O’Brien speak on a podcast about her leaving CNN. She spoke about how they never really “fired” her but they offered her a different position that she felt was not a good fit for her. To her credit she was able to walk away from CNN because she had financially positioned herself to do so. While working at CNN she was frugal with her money so that she was able to make better decisions based on what she wanted to do vs. what she had to do.

We’ve all been there. And there is being somewhere because you feel like you have to. Being in a relationship because you feel like you have to. If I leave this relationship then I’ll be alone. If I leave this job then how will I survive? Because let’s face it, we all have bills to pay.

Positioning yourself means giving yourself options. It’s a very helpless feeling knowing that other people literally hold your destiny in their hands. Hopefully they will have your best interest at heart but then again they may not. It’s a crap shoot.

So how do you position yourself?

Financially- living below your means. Have a nest egg so that if you need to make a decision you are making it from a point of substance and not survival.

Skills- work on improving your skill set so that you have more to offer. If you only know how to do one thing, then one thing is all that you can do.

Find your side hustle- this goes along with your finances AND improving your skills. That side hustle can help you to save. That side hustle can be your additional skill. This combination can be life saving.

Network- get to know people outside of your circle, that includes having a mentor. People who know you & your worth. People who can and will advocate for you, even when you are NOT in the room.

I encourage you to position yourself so that when you are ready to move, you can…..just like that!

What part of your life needs a position change?

Beewisdom-“Proper positive positioning is the key to experiencing miracles.” Edmond Mbiaka

 

Photos by kaughtbykaete.com 

Blogger XPO 2019

Hello Honeybees,

August was a crazy busy month. It started with a focus on family and ended with a focus on me. I spent a weekend in Nashville at the 2nd annual Blogger Xchange XPO.

The Blogger Xchange was founded by Leigh Love & Kay Elle. Both are Nashville natives that grew up together. They saw a need to bring the growing Nashville blogger community together and thus their first event was created. Leigh is a music, travel & events blogger. Kay Elle is a beauty, fashion and lifestyle blogger. The two together make a very dynamic team.

Fortunately for our local blogger community, they do come to Memphis to host classes which have been very helpful. So when I got the chance to attend this years XPO I jumped at it. My blogger boo Mocha_Divas and I hit the highway headed east ready to learn and grow.

Thursday night was VIP night. Once there we checked in to our hotel and got ready for a walking photo tour with Photo Walk Tour the Gulch. So many Instagramable spaces. Christy & Abbey did an great job especially working with all of us bloggers. We finished the tour at Winky Lux by making flower crowns. We didn’t make the kick off party that night because after the drive up and the photo walk we were tired but I heard that the guys from Slim & Husky’s shared some great advice.

Saturday was the big day. After a healthy breakfast from Rush Bowls and Box Water we headed into hear Memphis’ own Paris Chanel give the keynote speech. My takeaway from Paris was to pursue your passion. Blogging is a passion project for me so this was confirmation that I was in the right place. The rest of the day was filled with very informative sessions. My notebook is full of gems and action plans.

One of the speakers in my first session “Writing with Soul” was Brittney Oliver. When Brittney started to share her story I thought to myself, this sounds so familiar. Turns out I heard Brittney on one of my favorite podcast Switch,Pivot or Quit. A few of my other sessions included Perfecting the Feed and The Business of Blogging. The Business of Blogging helped us to understand some of the legal aspects of blogging. You know all those FTC rules and regulations.

Sunday Brunch fed my soul. The food provided by Chef Batts was delicious and the adult beverages were plentiful. But our brunch speaker Kenya Raymer of @Halfietruth was REAL. She  talked about setting boundaries in these internet streets and if you follow Kenya then you know that she doesn’t play about this and I so admire that. She also talked about being authentic, something that she does so well. It’s always interesting to me to meet people that I follow in person. I’m not always sure how to approach them but Kenya put me at ease.

I have my blog to do list and I have already tackled the first item. Yea me!!!! I also won a $150 gift card to Macy’s. I feel a haute fall wardrobe in my future.

I can not express the impact from the Blogger XPO weekend. Not just for the blog but for my life. I am already looking forward to next years XPO but in the meantime I’ll be ready for the next blogger class in Memphis.

Thanks Leigh & Kay for an awesome weekend. See you next year.

 

Beewisdom- “Education is the passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today.” – Malcolm X

 

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Diner En Blanc

Hello Honeybees,

The inaugural Diner En Blanc Memphis is termine` & this Honeybee is tired. I’ve always wanted to attend a Diner En Blanc event especially after seeing them in other cities. Thanks to Instagram I’ve watched Diner En Blanc in NY, NJ and Baltimore but there is nothing like having my own personal experience.

 

First things first. What exactly is Diner En Blanc? That’s a blog post in itself. Click on this link to read about the history of the event and it’s traditions, which includes keeping the location secret.

Unless I’m waaaay out of the loop Memphians didn’t share the secret location, although I KNOW people had to know. Great job 901! Being in this public space overlooking the mighty Mississippi was symbolic. Thank you Victoria Young for bringing Diner En Blanc to not only Memphis but to Tennessee. Every detail was simply beautiful.

Second. This event is not for procrastinators. There is A LOT of planning that goes into making DEB an enjoyable experience. My table mate was my blogger boo Desiree at Mocha Divas. Our process was to divide & conquer. We split the preparations so that no one would be overwhelmed. We purchased our table,chairs & food from the e-store so that we wouldn’t have to transport them. Next year I’ll probably still get the table & chairs from the e-store but I’ll bring my own food.

Third. You must wear white. I was lucky that I had several white dresses to choose from so that part was easy. Next year I’ll look for something more flowly, it was H-O-T but that’s Memphis in the summer. Here are few of my favorites from the night

 

 

My shoe game happened by accident. I love it when that happens. What do think?

Fourth. There are rules to this process:

Transportation- we meet our awesome table leader at our designated location & WALKED to our secret location. It wasn’t far but… walking….in Memphis…in August, but it was all part of the experience & I enjoyed the sea of white walking through downtown. The tourists were really curious & we stopped several times to explain our adventure.

The tables. The tables are lined up to look like one super long picnic table. Every table is covered with a white tablecloth. Creativity really came out in the centerpieces & table settings.

The beginning & the end. After everything is set up dinner starts with the waving of the napkins (while there’s still daylight) & it’s officially over with the lighting of the sparklers (when it’s dark).

 

The Honeybee is NOT an outdoors person AT ALL but I am so glad that I put that aside and attended Diner En Blanc. Life is about living and enjoying every experience and I must say I really enjoyed this one.

 

 

Beewisdom- I’m just enjoying my life at the moment

901 to 504

Hello Honeybees,

Despite the title this post is not about me taking my son to college in New Orleans. In fact it has absolutely nothing to do with our college drop off experience. This 901 to 504 has everything to do with a new boutique that just opened this past week in the Edge District in Memphis.

I had the privilege of interviewing the owners Stephanie and Lisa and attending an event a few days before the grand opening.

What does the name mean? Where did it come from?

Nine01 II Five04 is a combination of area codes from Memphis and New Orleans. 
Two best friends separated by area codes and the Mississippi River came together 
in Memphis to open our first boutique. 

 

 

How did you find each other?

 

We met in a really odd way about ten years ago. Let me preface by saying, both of us are southern women who say please and thank you and hold doors for people. We were both walking into a building and a woman in front of us let the door slam right in our faces. Lisa and I both started talking about how rude the occurrence was and then the conversation continued. We are talkers so it went on for a while and we realized we had so much in common. I told Lisa I was a stylist and we started shopping together. Not that she needs my help picking out clothes, it was just a fun way for us to hang out. 

 

What made you open the store?

 

Owning our own store is something we both have wanted before we even knew one another. 
Stephanie started working in retail at age 15 and it became her dream to have her own store because of her love for fashion, merchandising and styling people to make them look and feel their best. Lisa has always loved fashion and shopping. She is a business owner in New Orleans so she has the expertise with the paperwork and financial aspect side. Together, we have an excellent balance to create a successful retail business. The dynamic just works for us. We are both only children and have found a sisterhood with each other. It’s so amazing to come to our store 6 days a week, build something we’ve both dreamed of and work with your best friend. 

 

 

 

Why this location?

 

After a few years of talking about opening our own business, we decided to make the leap and ventured out to find the perfect space. We started looking in late 2017 and it took about a year to find what we wanted. We picked the 676 Marshall Ave location for the high foot traffic and proximity to Sun Studios. There is so much happening in the Medical District / The Edge and we wanted to get in on 
the ground floor of development to make our mark in the area. Lisa and I looked in several areas of Memphis but The Edge District just felt right. You know when you get that feeling that everything is going to fall into place? That’s the feeling we had when we saw this building. It was important to us to find a space where we felt at home and we found that at 676 Marshall. Also, the cross street is South Orleans Avenue so we agreed that was a great plus side and would help to encompass the 504 area code in our business name. 

 

 

 

What brands do you carry? How much is local?

When we went to market, we wanted to find items that no one else really had in the city. We are the only retail store carrying Duck Head and are hosting a Memphis Tigers Tailgate with them on August 31 to promote the store and the Collegiate Duck Head line. We are carrying Psycho Bunny for men, 7Diamonds, Bed Stu and Duke Cannon. Our women’s selection is extensive. We have gorgeous handmade dresses from Spain, woven boots and backpacks from The Netherlands and handcrafted bags from Russia. Things you won’t find anywhere else in the city. We are also housing local art from our respective cities of Memphis and New Orleans with lines like Sarah Ott New Orleans, Estes Designs, Paper Cloth Glass, Hard Knot Designs, Cry Baby Club Gang, Jo Wayland-Smith Art, Antzee Magruder Fabric Art and we will be carrying Kristin Magdalene Knits for fall. 

Who is your “customer”

In a world that is divided there’s no room for more turmoil. We even have a doormat that reads, “All Are Welcome Here.” There is something in Nine01 II Five04 for every man and woman in sizes up to 3X. We have Memphis art starting at $3 and quality leather goods topping the chart at $600. There is something in here to fit any budget and lifestyle. We wanted to create a one stop shop. At our boutique you can pick up an inexpensive gift for a co-worker and treat yo self while you’re here. 

There you have it. Stop by and visit the store and tell them that The Honeybee sent you.

 

 

Beewisdom- Love Where You Live, Shop Local

Seasons Change

Hello Honeybees,

I wrote this post seating on the couch in an Airbnb in New Orleans. I was in NOLA to take my youngest son to college. My smallest birdie is learning to fly, but that’s another post for another day once I get all of these emotions together.

One thing on this journey that I have come to embrace is that my season is about to change. I have spent the last 20 years of my life making sure that the two humans that I delivered into this world had everything that they needed. For most of their life it has been just me. But the time has come where they are no longer my day to day responsibility. No, I’m not just throwing in the towel on them, quite the opposite. It’s just that my level of involvement is shifting gears.

I no longer have to attend back to school activities, PTA meetings, school programs and parent teacher conferences. I no longer have to find child care for the breaks (this time has long since passed but stay with me here) or for those last minute snow days. I use to hold on to vacation and sick days just in case one of the boys got sick so I would have the time to take off.

Well those days are no more. My season has changed. My new season is all about moi. I can now move about life on my terms and let me tell you it feels wonderful already. Just the thought of it makes me do a happy dance. It makes me excited for what is to come.

Big changes are headed my way and I am ready.

So if you see me out in these streets just know that I am enjoying my new season.

 

Beewisdom- To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.” — Ecclesiastes 3:1

Peace Be Still

Hello Honeybees,

A few months ago I asked what excites you? This month I want to know what brings you peace? What keeps you centered? What helps to sooth your soul? Where do you find your zen moments?

We spend a lot of time running, moving and staying busy. I don’t mean running & moving as in exercise but running as in errands and handling day to day life. We spend a lot of time taking care of those around us, especially our children or aging parents. We live a go, go, go life. But when all of the running, and the hustle & bustle stop what helps you to center yourself? What makes you be still and exhale?

Sometimes our bodies will slow us down if we don’t take care of it. Sometimes our loved ones or our friends will slow us down. True friends will call you out and pull your coat tail as my grandma says. But when YOU take control, how do you slow down, exhale and find peace?

This looks different for everyone. What works for someone else might not work for you. Some people might see cooking as a peaceful way to center themselves, to others it could be soaking in the tub surrounded by candles.

I find my peace in having a quiet moment alone reading a book with a cup of hot tea or a glass of wine. If at all possible this would be on a beach or near a body of water. But the key word for me is ALONE. I relish my time alone. It brings me so much peace and stillness. I love being around people but I can get “peopled” out real quick. My sons understand this and they know when to leave momma alone. My alone time recharges my battery.

It’s okay to find your peace and to enjoy it. You deserve it! Now go find YOUR peace.

Beewisdom- Nobody can bring you peace but yourself -Ralph Waldo Emerson